Moses

Well...I'm here.  In Ashland, KY.  Don't know where that is?  Click here


I feel a little out of sorts...not quite like a fish out of water, but I'm certain that I'm 'not in Kansas  anymore'.


I wonder what Moses felt like the DAY AFTER he had to leave Egypt and found himself in a new location?  Do you suppose that he was a little frustrated?  That he felt like he was doing the right thing by defending that Hebrew, but instead ended up on the run and away from home?  Do you think that he ever asked God, 'Why does following you mean that I'm stuck in this off the radar screen town tending sheep'?


I'm pretty sure that he had a conversation similar to that one once or twice.  I know that I have as of late.


I'm not mad at God, or even questioning His 'will' for my life at the moment.  What I'm wondering is "If I did what I felt like you told me to do, then why am I HERE?"


My ego isn't bruised.  My faith isn't wavering.  I have complete confidence in God to do whatever He wants with and in my life.  I just would like to know why I used to have a pretty good seat at the table, and now it feels like I've been bumped to the kid's table (you remember that from the family thanksgiving meals, right?)


My new job for the moment is helper.  I help.  I help around the house and I help around the store.  I'm not really in charge of anything.  I used to be in charge of everything.  It's been a bit of a switch for me actually.  In some ways good, in some ways not-so-good.


If you're tempted to reply to me something like 'enjoy the journey'...don't bother.  I'm trying to enjoy it.  But it's hard to enjoy something that threatens your financial future--as in NO JOB to pay on the debt that we've incurred.  It's hard to enjoy something that you can't really explain to your kids--as in "I don't know why God would pull us out of Colorado and all that we loved to come here to Kentucky where we don't know anyone, and where we feel like we fit in as well as a pimple on the end of your nose.


Life is hard--believe me, I know that already.  God is good--I know that one already too.


The reality is that I'm not struggling with life being hard, or that God is good (or not).  What I seem to be struggling with these days is why did I have to leave Egypt?  I'm sure that Moses probably wondered that one too.